Sweet Tooth

Mom-Are you ready to go? ( From the ice cream shop)

Sister- No, I want to finish my ice cream.

Brother- If you really want to finish your ice cream, then let me have some.

Who's the boss?

Not the pick up line I was thinking of...

5 year old who is ALL boy-

" There is a girl over there I would like to meet.
  Do you think she likes ninjas?
  I'll have to ask her. "

heckin'

heckin'-

An Interjection

(used as an expression of curiosity, confusion, surprise,  thrill, dislike, etc. ) 

(euphemism for heck.)

Ex: What the heckin?

Most effective when combined with ," ...in the world." 

Ex:

  

"Why the heckin' in the world is Quinn standing on the picnic table ?!" 

Modern Day Sacagawea

Mom- "How did you get those holes in your tights?"
Daughter- "I was fighting a tiger."

Motivation

P's reason for wanting to start his summer job at the family company:

" Because when Papa Pete and Daddy dies, who is going to the be the boss?"

180 Days of School

In every kindergarten class across America they celebrate the 100th day of school. 100 out of the required 180. My kindergartener had a wonderful week in school. He had the 100th day head banner, 100th day party etc etc etc...

But the days that followed 100th day, he seemed almost depressed.  To the point that he said he didn't want to go to school. Are you sick? No. Is there a bully? No.

Two mornings post 100th day, he finally confessed what was bothering him. Now that they got to the 100th day of school and were able to count from 1-100, they were going to have to start counting backwards from 80-1,...counting backwards!!

Best Behavior

Before visiting pretty much any public place, I remind the children before we get out of the car, that I expect best behavior. Today we were heading into the doctor's office. So I asked them to list some actions that are excepted as best behavior. Pearce, a studious as can be, rambled of the obvious best behavior that would be asked of most families. But to customize this to our barn occupants, he finished with, "And no tackling and no pulling the fire alarm." 

That's a good question.

Pearce is currently into his future life with a wife, a family and a dog. He asked  if anyone ever had 10 kids. I said, "Sure." He replied, " They must have a lot of fun." Then just when I thought he was ready to move onto another topic , he asked, "But what if they were all girls?!"

So Proud of You Great Grandma!

During a lovely visit with the children's Great Grandma (GGB), I was passing them the subliminal messages that, we treat our elders with respect. McCullough really seemed to pick up on this surprisingly quickly and with great enjoyment. She was getting GGB a drink and bringing it to her, getting her some lunch and bringing it to her, setting a blanket over her lap to keep the chill away etc...

So at the end of GGB's visit, she got up to say goodbye. As she walked towards McCullough for a hug, McCullough, with the joy of a proud mother of an infant, screeched , "You're walking!!!!"

Positive Association

After Pearce heard a gun shot in the distance ( during hunting season!) he took a long sigh, looked up to the sky and with a twinkle in his eyes, gently let out the words through his slight grin, " The sound of a gun reminds me of Grandpa."

Mom M.D.

My "Mom M.D." advice to any mother whose child is starting to verbalize their ailments. Here are a few per-translations that may prevent an ER visit:

* My Brain Hurts= A headache, not a brain tumor
* My Neck Hurts= A soar throat, not meningitis
* It Feels Like Someone put Wood in my Throat- A severe soar throat, not a need for an xray
* T-Rex Bit My Ear= An ear infection, not the return of the dinosaurs
* My Knee Hurts= Something probably does hurt.  But at the age of 2 or 3, most likely this is not their knee. They just want to use the word, but don't have the correct body part to go with it. So ask for a finger point in this case.
* I Need a New Stomach= A belly ache, not a need for a transplant
* It Hurts as Much as Getting Struck by a Tornado= A severe belly ache, not concern that your child is out in the middle night hanging with storm chasers. 
* Like an Alligator attacking= Again a severe belly ache, no need to change his name to Steve Irwin.

Birthday Manners

While celebrating Aunt MaryAnne's 23rd birthday, Q did his best to gobble down a candle as fast as he did the cake. Aunt MaryAnne kindly told Q, "No we don't eat the candles." Offering an appropriate alternative, M exclaimed, "We just lick them!" And of course, continued to demonstrate.

Cully Sweetheart

For the past 3 months, M has preferred to be addressed as Sweetie Pie
( "Because that's what my daddy calls me" she says.)
This was really cute, when she told Santa that was her name. But recently, when she told the dentist to call her Sweetie Pie, I feel she crossed a line.

Baby bump?

While chatting with her babysitter, McCullough asked her if she had a baby in her belly. Politely, her dear sitter said, "No I don't have a baby in my belly." McCullough furthered asked, "Is your baby in your back?"

When Pearce was bummed that basketball was over for the season, I told him that maybe he could go to basketball camp in the summer. Very concerned, he followed my suggestion, with, "Does that mean I'll have to sleep outside with the coyotes?!"  No that's only if you're Labron James trying to play basketball for Cleveland again.

Across Enemy Lines

  On a cool evening of February in the year 2012, the troops were settling into camp. Before signing off for the night, General Pearce made one last visit to the outhouse. Unfortunately, it was during this time of weakness, that Admiral McCullough made the historic move across enemy lines.
  Earlier that day, the General's soldiers had seized the airplane trinket and it was now under his possession. Despite this victory, the Admiral was not ready to fully accept defeat. So once the General was clear of the premises, she made her move in what we now call today, McCullough's Crossing. With no discretion, she ripped through the General's camp, leaving debris tossed throughout the property. After realizing the cache was not to be found she hastily sought refuge back in her camp.
  Because of the  General's experience, he was prepared for the amateurs' predictable plan of action. It was said that the trinket never left his person. So after returning to his shelter, he was not surprised to find it completely ransacked and knew exactly who was to blame. When Private Quinn was approached the following morning for any further eyewitness accounts, he had no comment.

A dose of your daily chuckle...and it wasn't my kid!

I can not claim the following incident...though I don't put it past my second born son.

If you have seen this in the past, it is good enough for an encore!

Where's your sister?! 

Click above for the link...

Lenten Sacrifices - Overheard

While sitting in church on the first Sunday of Lent, I overheard the following conversation:
Grandma- What do you love to do?
3 year old Grandson- Go to Elmo's place
Grandma- Do you think you give that up till Easter?
Grandson- Sure!
Older and Wiser Sister- No Grandma. That's Sesame Place. And we don't go there till summer anyway.
Grandma- Okay. What else do you love that you could give up?
Grandson- T-shirts. Ties.
Mom-( from under her breath) - He said earlier that he was going to give up church.

And he wasn't joking...

During our week and half quarantined indoors and in which Lysol could pretty much sum up our life during that time, I asked Pearce when he thought he would be able to return to school. With a response so quick that dismissed any doubt on his end, he moaned, "Saturday."

A Bite out of Crime

After frantically looking for the Lobsters library book that was due back that morning in school, I asked Pearce if by chance he remembered the last place he read it. Of course! It was under his pillow because his dear sister wanted it , but he saw the look on her face and knew she wanted to take a bite out of it. Why didn't I think of that myself?

Phonetics

PWB's Kindergarten Science Test:
Q: What planet do we live on?
A: Rf

A Day Off

After running multiple errands through the Christmas season and attending and dressing for multiple Christmas festivities, McCullough took a deep sigh as we trudged through a store and let out, " I need a day off."
"From WHAT?!" I questioned.
"From Christmas."

Table Manners

One evening while at dinner, everyone was taking turns sharing the events of their day. The second Pearce completed his loquacious run, Quinn, with eyes as wide as the Pacific, let out a record breaking burp. His timing was impeccable.  It was as if he was summing up the day in the life of a 1.5 yr old.
Then not a moment too soon, with a smirk as mischievous as Dennis the Menace, he responded to his belly belch with, "Uh-oh!" Again, reiterating a day in the life of Quinn.

The Name Game

A recent car conversation from the second and third row drivers:

M: Ok Bud.
P- Don't call me Bud. I don't like nicknames. Call me Spiderman, Superman or Optimus Prime. Which one do you want to call me?
M: (In all effort to say it clearly) Optimus Prime
P: That's too hard for you to say. Call me Arrow.

*Fast forward 5 minutes.
Quinn did something that Pearce liked.
Pearce then said to Quinn. "Good job Bud!"